Body Language of Controlling People

The controlling people have a very characteristic verbal language, associated with impatience and anxiety. A tension that they often transmit through non-conscious corporal expressions.

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The body language of controlling people is sometimes very evident, but sometimes it goes unnoticed. The truth is that, drivers or not, much of our time is spent communicating with others, often being unaware of it.

The main means of communication is the body. As we are not aware of a good part of our mime, it usually transmits more genuine messages about our true thoughts and feelings.

Each gesture and each posture can say something about what we have in mind. Hence, we can know much more about a person examining what he says with his body, than listening to what he expresses with his words. In the case of the body language of controlling people: their desire for control manifests itself in behaviors associated with anxiety in situations in which their perceived control is low.

What are those gestures and postures that mark the body language of the controlling people? As always, it is necessary to examine their faces, how they handle their hands, in addition to the posture of their body and even their breathing. These are some of its most distinctive features.

“Beware of the man who talks about putting things in order. Putting things in order always means putting things under your control.”

-Denis Diderot-

The face in the body language of the controlling people

There are several aspects of the face that characterize the body language of the controlling people. When a person is spontaneous and sincere tends to gesticulate at the time of speaking. His muscles are relaxed and his words are somehow accompanied by consistent expressions in his eyes, his smile and his face in general.

In the body language of controlling people, the face remains rigid. There is something impersonal about his gesturing, if he does. In general, it is clear that the person aims to keep the communication under control (another issue is that he achieves it with more or less success).

It is also common for dominant people to look too fixedly. They stare at someone and sometimes they do not blink. This, in one way or another, intimidates your interlocutor. That look is a way to exercise power and also to challenge. Sometimes gestures appear such as tipping the mouth down or having haughty expressions, raising the chin.

The asymmetry in the postures

Another distinguishing feature in the body language of controlling people is the posture of their bodies. In general, they tend to locate themselves and adopt gestures that project superiority over others. It is usual for this type of person to lift their shoulders and expand their chest, precisely because they want to look more imposing in front of the other.

It is also common to try to be placed in a vertical position in front of your interlocutor, so that it is at a lower level. Then, for example, they stand up to talk, while the other remains seated. Seeing the other from above gives them a feeling of greater power.

The best example of this is police interrogations. In these, the accused remains seated, while the policeman is standing. The latter also walks or moves, while the other is limited in its movements. All this strengthens control.

Arms, hands and other aspects

People who seek to exercise dominion or control over others often make quick and inaccurate movements with their hands. It is common for them to do what is commonly known as “manotear”. That is, move your hands up and down to give more emphasis to what you are saying. Also to show greater energy and forcefulness.

Another of the frequent gestures in the body language of controlling people is the index finger pointing towards the other. This is a gesture that, in principle, is a warning signal. However, implicitly it is also a signal and even an accusation. This, of course, conditions the emotional state of who is indicated. It gives control to whoever wields it and takes it away from its interlocutor.

On the other hand, dominant people often use their arms to increase the space they occupy. They put their hands on their waists in an attitude of complaint or cross their arms. If they are standing and the other sitting, it is also common that they close the fists and support them on the table.

All these elements of the body language of controlling people can also be used in favor. According to experts on the subject, adopting these gestures and postures, at times when we feel intimidated or vulnerable, helps us to recover the feeling of control.